The thorn of child loss

"I learned…that the grace of God is sufficient, as He said, but I also learned that grace is not an anesthetic. The hours and days and even months that followed Ned’s death were so intense with pain that, looking back, I wonder that we did not die. The hurt was so great, the suffering so... Continue Reading →

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Refusing to accept reality

I keep trying to process this loss, but my mind just refuses to believe the truth. Countless times a day, I catch myself picking up the phone to call my mom. A thousand times, I pull up my Gmail to start an email to her. I begin to text my mom, only to have reality... Continue Reading →

Breathing deep

I didn't realize how little I was breathing. I mean, sure, I'm breathing. Obviously. But when you live as a parent with a child who struggles with debilitating anxiety and grief daily, you find yourself unintentionally, unconsciously holding your breath. Each day becomes a game of mind tag, emotions and worrisome thoughts chasing each other... Continue Reading →

Living broken

I've been a bit quiet on the blog front the past several weeks. Absorbing and processing the 7 year anniversary of my son's death left me feeling weak and vulnerable. How I wanted to be strong, yet felt anything but. Truly, Paul's words in Philippians 4:13 evidenced themselves throughout the oh, so painful, month of July. "I... Continue Reading →

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