Dear Matt,

Dear Matt, Nine years. How have I lived 9 years without you? How is it possible I’m still breathing? The overwhelming weight of grief as July 29th approaches, the day you died, Matt, bears down, crushes my soul in these moments. Your death remains devastating. There is no cure, no fix, for child loss. There...

Just Wear the Damn Mask

“Just Wear the Damn Mask” I’ve been quiet for far too long for a number of reasons. But with my city’s passing of a mask wearing ordinance recently, I can no longer hold my silence. I’ve listened to the arguments for and against mask wearing ad nauseam. I’ve heard the mask ball argument fling back...

Father’s Day for the broken

Father's Day was a week ago, but I've still been thinking about fathers. Some fathers, like mine, were downright damaging. I don't mean to dishonor my father or his memory by saying that, but the truth is that many of us grew up with fathers who simply fell short. In my case, my dad was...

Blooming lilacs and grief

We gathered as family on May 20th, 2017 for one of the happiest days of our lives, the day our mom got married. It was a glorious day that fulfilled our 30+ years of prayers. Who knew that just 16 short months later we'd gather again as family for one of the worst days of...

27 Reasons to love you

He called me one night and asked me out. I said no. He called again a week or so later. Thinking, "Okay, fine. I'll get this guy off my back and go out with him," I said yes. Thank God I did. The short story? We had a date one September evening in 1992. He...

The perfect cocktail of grief

Grief is a strange mix. I've drunk of this powerful drink for over eight years. For me, it is as if to put a jigger of Matt's birthday in a tall glass called May, pour another measure of Mother's Day and add a shot of our wedding anniversary, then follow up with a chaser of...